They say “beauty is in the eye of the beholder”. Well, what my eye is beholding, I’m not a fan of.
For years I struggled with my physical image. I had every eating disorder under the sun, I never went anywhere without make up on, and looking in the mirror was a difficult and emotional task. Probably for the same reason most people go through similar events, I wanted to be…beautiful.
As a kid, I would dream about waking up as someone else, someone beautiful. My life would start all over and everything would be perfect. Now, I dream someone will give me a few thousand dollars for plastic surgery. Any sugar mommas in the house?
I realize most women are in my boat; even those perfect women that I envy have their “ugly” days. More importantly, everyone has flaws; no one is perfect, and if they claim to be, I’m sure their personality is what makes them ugly. But why can’t I be happy in my own skin, flaws and all? Or why can’t I be seen as the person that I am, not the size of my hips?
I would like to blame men or the media for the harsh way I look at myself; men all have this illusion of what women should look like, while the media pressures women to be perfect. Sure, we can blame them for all of our problems, but we should be looking at ourselves, too. We might be impressionable, some more than others, but I’ll give the finger to any magazine or man who thinks they can try and change me.
Not to say wanting to look your best is a bad thing; even after this epiphany, I still want a boob job. The difference is I’m doing it for myself. Not my boyfriend. Not to impress others. Me. Because if I’m going to have these hips, I want boobs to balance them out. But I digress.
It doesn’t matter what you want to do, as long as you do it for the right reason. The old expression, “you must love yourself before you can love others”, is quite accurate. People and their relationships (love, friendship, or otherwise) can be destroyed because of a beauty complex. Don’t ever expect for the person you love to fill whatever void you had beforehand. That’ll never happen and it’s not fair to either of you. You’re a person, not a charity case. Love yourself first, and then you can love others. And if that means dying your hair purple and getting a spray tan, more power to you.
Perfection is a pipe dream that people have been chasing for years. It has no true definition when it comes to humans, and honestly, has no place in my world. If everyone looked the same, the world would be incredibly dull and who would want that?
Take a moment and look at yourself, look at your flaws and embrace them. Those are the things that make us human. We can complain about them, embrace them, or fix them, as long as we recognize that no matter what, we are beautiful.
There is a dramatic progression here from struggling with self image to embracing one's self flaws and all. In order for the reader to appreciate this transformation, it has to be described with more specific detail. You achieve universality through the particular. Try to avoid the generalizations and abstractions (Perfection is a pipe dream that people have been chasing for years) and focus on the specific details of your particular experience (who did you want to wake up as?). These details are not a digression but the heart of the matter.
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